Apologies wordsmiths, my absence was unavoidable. There was the small matter of a trip to New York.
My travelling companion, the husband, began to realise the horrendous levels that my checking of grammar can reach.
Subway on the way to Coney Island
Me: Oh look, Kings Highway station. Shouldn’t that have an apostrophe?
Husband: Oh my God, really? You are a nightmare.
You too can find love
According to a Subway advert for Channel 25’s English language learning, when I do learn English I’ll get love, success, friendship, hope, community and family. Does this only work if I study with Channel 25? I seem to be missing out on love, success and hope at the moment. And I’m not sure whether I want to be part of the communities I have to hand…
Under rings and meatloaf
Maybe the advert works immediately as I was heartened to hear a mother on the Subway back to Manhattan helping her child pronounce words correctly. Although the exchange was rather bizarre, witness the following:
Mother: Say it. Say it. I like meatloaf. Come on now I like meatloaf.
Child remains silent.
Mother: I like meatloaf, I like meatloaf, I like meatloaf.
Child: I like under rings. I want under rings.
Mother: Say it properly or you won’t get any. I want onion rings.
Child: I want under rings.
Mother: No. I want onion rings.
Child (trying really hard): I want on-er-ion rings.
Mother hands over some crappy onion ring crisps.
In my experience ‘I want’ never gets. She should have been teaching him to say please and thank you, surely?